These are a few of the many things that haven't been sent for... reasons.

Over the many years that have sadly passed there have been moments where I wanted to tell you the stories and things I intend to share with you here.

These things are primarily for you my children: Ethan, Maddox, Sakura, and Jonas.

These things are also sometimes for my niece Jolie as well who unfortunately also lost her mother to her father* in a very terrible but even more closed physical complete way than even mine have.

They're the letters that were not able to be sent for fear of being censored or otherwise manipulated.

They're testaments to the things that were but you were never told about.

They're the other part of the story that you were denied to know existed.

They're the truth behind the gifts you were lied to about that were sent only to be claimed as given by someone else.

They're the stacks and boxes of items that I got with you in mind only for them to sit and wait idly in the interim.

They're so many many many things that...

Dear loves of mine,

Please know that you are always with me regardless if you are always with me.

We may be far away at times but, like these trees and stories, as long as you can hear your heart beating, and even someday when I'm gone even more like your aunt Jess/ Jolie's mother I hope that you will know...

We will always be together.

This is a series of compilations set aside for you.

This is our mixtape* waiting for you to press play.

Please forgive me for not having sent them when I got them for you.

Please understand that there were reasons why I sadly... kept it this way before.

Someday perhaps.


Some... way.

And I will always find a way.